Morning in the Park

In park this morning, Jenny makes friends with extremely large standard poodle, very drooly and galoomphy. Jenny and poodle chase each other around, bark, and seem to invite me to join in the fun. Do so for a bit, running around with both dogs. Jenny eventually sits down to scratch at what am going to pretend is not a flea, poodle sits at my feet and lets out a distinct burp. Have never heard a dog burp and astonished. Owner of poodle appears and says Oh Ace say excuse me. Owner is stylishly disheveled, wearing jeans, the kind of plaid shirt that have seen at Steven Alan and coveted--am not interested in man for self, naturally, even if he didn't seem straight. Look for clues to confirm straightness: wears no wedding ring, and has air of bachelorhood, though not of caddishness, so think immediately of the Contessa. (Later see with horror that have based all favorable impressions on his dog.) As is customary, names of dogs are exchanged, but not names of humans. Poodle--who turns out to be a mix of Golden Retriever and poodle, and who is still less than a year old--is named Sam. When get to work call up the Contessa and tell her that have met very nice man. What do you know about him? Tell her that he has a golden doodle. The Contessa says she is not in the mood for jokes this morning. Explain that Sam is a very nice dog and has she ever heard a dog burp? No she hasn't, she says frostily. Do not at all care for her attitude and say that have meeting to go to. So do I, replies the Contessa.