Laundry Mishap

Laundry in familiar sorry state this morning. Am forced to wear extremely ancient boxers (Brain trots down familiar path of associations, beginning with where underwear originally purchased, followed by thought about how really ought to have bought That Coat and ending in very dark place in head in which it becomes clear that all decisions at all times have been for the worst.) Attend yoga class at lunch. Once start moving, begin to hear ripping noises. Am, at first, very alarmed that pants ripping and will have to crab walk out of yoga studio so as not to flash fellow students. Check seams and see that pants (at least) in suitable order. Deduce that boxers have met demise. As am not actually showing anything, feel that will deal with ripped underwear after class. (Later, not so certain that this hippyish position either justified, or even hyegenic). Leave studio. Back at office call Dave. Tell story of the underwear in attempt to be Funny. At end of story (highly embellished and much, much longer than time actual events took)am met with silence. Ask, What is wrong? Dave says that he is Sad. He thinks that we shouldn't live this way. Agree. Say, We shoud set aside one day a week to do laundry. Or we could even take it to the wash-and-fold. Dave, says, No, It is time to Ask for Help, which sounds sinister. Says he is going to ask for a Housekeeper for Chrismas. (Brain, unhelpfully, not to mention disturbingly, provides image of having to clear out closet so that Housekeeper has a place to live.) Engage in tense conversation in which (in retrospect see that tone a bit hyperbolic) suggest that Dave wants to have a Slave. Dave takes similarly extreme position. Work ourselves around to compromise. We will have somebody in once a week to do the laundry and the heavy cleaning. Am shocked to see that have also agreed to go do Dave's mother's house (according to all stories and information gleaned from Dave himself, not a happy place) for Christmas--somehow this is tied up into asking for help. Do not think it can end well, but because loathe laundry above all else in life, do not object.