Wall to Wall Meetings

Have left poor blog unattended--as have left much else unattended--because of mandatory and debilitating schedule of meetings. But no (one thinks in the meeting) it does one no good to wish that one was not sitting in chair listening to people speak about budgets. It is a struggle to keep one's eyes open and also a struggle not to jump up on chair and hoot like an owl. This sets of fantastical and diverting train of thought featuring question of What would happen if...What would happen if I fainted? What would happen if I just got up and left the room and didn't come back? What if I passed a Funny note to the New Man (also sitting at the meeting and looking less than fully alert, have seen him attempt to take sip of coffee from his empty cup many times)? Thoughts revert to grimness of situation. On some level, tedium is probably good for one--suffering is good. Scold self sharply. This is not suffering. What if one was in Iraq? What if one had a tumor? (One begins to wonder if one does have a tumor. It is likely.) Lunch is provided at last meeting, no chips, which am very disappointed by, cookies are always to be avoided (Would wager money that if subject were blindfolded and tasted oatmeal, chocolate chip and peanut butter cookies, subject could not tell the difference between them--not even by texture.) Settle on ham and brie sandwich on rye and take 4 packets of mustard to try and kill taste of sandwich. Mustard sadly not up to the task: ham is bilious, brie tastes like Vaseline, and rye bread--the less said of the rye bread the better. Half way through sandwich, am utterly revolted and push plate away. Decide to draw. From mustard packet copy sketch of Heinz mustard jar. Own version of mustard jar extremely professional looking. Feel that a Hot Dog would go well with mustard, and attempt. Result very very phallic. Become afraid that neighbor has seen drawing, and briskly turn page of notebook, while turning hot and embarrassed. Mortification for once serves helpful purpose. Sit up straight and alert for rest of meeting.