Olympics Part II

Last night Dave and I watch more of the Olympics. Both of us state quite clearly and firmly that we don't like to watch figure skating At All and that if it comes one, we will turn off the TV. I mention the use of nude hose on the chest portion of the men's suits as my least favorite aspect of the sport. Dave says simply, The Hair. Nevertheless, when the skating comes on, we do not either turn the channel (or, as Dave says) Cut the TV Off even though there is abundant nude hose and Hair in evidence. The commentators make vaugely racist generalizations about the contestants, i.e. The Chinese are Known for their Technical skills. Would not be shocked to hear the Canadian woman add, And also the Chinese are good at Math and Science. One couple dances to songs from the Phantom of the Opera. Am deeply horrified and am reaching for remote control when the broadcast cuts to a Story about the Russians. Am sorry to admit that become most interested in skating when frightening clip of old competition is played in which the Russian man holds the woman above his head. He appears to falter and then woman is flung to the ice. She lies in a heap, unconscious. Next, up is the russian woman talking. She is summing up their problems. The Man has begun to skate like they skated 10 years ago. He has lost his nerve, She, on the other hand doesn't remember a thing, so she's not afraid at all. (She says this last bit defiantly, which makes it sound like she might have more than a passing experience with Blacking Out.) The Russians skate passably, if tentatively. A new Chinese couple comes on the ice. They will attempt the Quadruple Sow Cow (Sow Chow? Both seem unlikely,) which has never been accomplished before in competition. Sit on edge of sofa. In startling recrudescence of falling theme, the woman loses her balance, skidding across the ice on her knees. She, as they say in sporting circles, Shakes it Off, and finishes her routine beautifully. Cry a little bit. See Dave seruptitiously wipe his eyes with the corner of his sleeve. Idiotic commentatator quite unnecessarily says, You'd never guess from her small frame that her heart is as big as the skating rink.