Plumbing

Am taking out toolbox from under kitchen sink so that can hang up lithograph purchased in New Mexico when discover that pipe is leaking at brisk rate. Call Dave over. Am 99 percent certain that leak caused by rough handling of tool box -- hole in exact position that corner of tool box previously rested -- so try to make joke about What a Way to Start the Morning! Dave not amused, face very grim. An hour later, after several trip to the hardware store and after pressing the Super into service, pipe is replaced and am very relieved. Dave is still unhappy. He gestures at the space under the sink, says, How long has it been since this has been cleaned out? Answer self evident: A long time. How long? asks Dave. Calculate in head that has not been cleaned since moved in, but embarassed to say so. This is a terrible mess he says (it is, but feelings hurt anyway.) He unearths heaps of bags -- plastic, paper with ribbon handles, paper with rope handles, thousands the narrow scarlet plastic bags from the wine store -- also a sack of cactus potting soil (!), a small broom and dustpan, a mouse trap (thankfully no mouse attached), can of oven cleaner, can of spray adhesive, glass bottles saved for recycling since 2001, Indian Cookboook, and 2 cans of cat food. Help by making many trips to the trash chute. When come back after tenth trip, see that space is all cleaned out and that Dave is on floor scrubbing with rag. He says a curse word. Urge him to smile--We are Almost Done! Dave says tightly, he would smile, but he has just kneeled on a piece of broken glass. Apologize and treat wound with Neosporin. On way to work, feel that morning very uninspiring and made less so by neighbor on one side who coughs tubucularly and woman on other who persists in playing extremely loud game on her telephone. All is forgotten when get to work to receive email from the Contessa which says, in its entirety, We are moving in together. For split second am afraid that she means to move into my apartment and feel that we will be very cramped indeed, but quickly see that she means that she and the New Man will cohabitate. Call her immediately. She confirms. She is moving out of her apartment at the end of the month and into his, Gulp. Assure her that she will be Fine.